Eternal Fall

ETERNAL FALL

Fall days are my favorite for taking walks. The trees in their multitude of colors, hanging on for the last bit of sunshine, before going dormant for the winter adding a festive feast for the eyes. . The leaves themselves, clinging to life until the last moment when a gust of wind takes them to their resting place bring about an appreciation for life still lived. . The smell of those leaves, already fallen, giving off the musk of promised future life giving fertilizer. The summer has already gone, the barren winter beckons and the coming spring is just a promise for now. On this particular fall day I walked as usual in the city park. It was not cold enough yet to wear a jacket but the breeze reached out with a taste of chills to come. The ground was still wet from the evening rain and the lights had just come on adding color to the leaves that, just for a moment, would vie with each other for attention before the sun would leave and the leaves would grow dark.

I was left contemplating life. It had been a long time since I took a walk with someone and I found myself deep in reflection. I was content with my life and happy to go on as usual. I was reaching a point where there were more years behind me than ahead of me and my focus was on things other than a fleeting companionship or some attempt at staving off the end with a rushed attachment. Dong so reminded me of the lives, so desperately hanging on to the tree, not wanting to let go I was OK with letting go when it was time. My fall was here and winter was coming. The spring I was to see would be in another realm.

I am not sure what happened. Was it my contentment with life? Was it the fact that I really did want to hang on desperately for just a little bit more? I am not sure. I can only say that my life changed forever. I was walking down the path when my eye caught another walking my way. I have passed many people over the years but this time was different. I was instantly taken by this person. It was a woman, a bit younger, but not too young. It was an immediate attraction, which was surprising; surprising because she seemed different to me than those of whom I had been interested in before. . Her hair was a red that made the leaves jealous; the green of her eyes was the envy of their youth. Her demeanor, what little could be ascertained on such short notice, was pleasant and open. I was moved and for reasons that shook me for they could not be readily found. I was not looking to find someone. I was content. Why was I taken so quickly by this person? What about her? Was this to be another fleeting moment that would pass forever by and leave me suddenly wanting for that which I thought I needed no more?

I did something different, something unlike my persona. I, the usual stoic and analytically natured person, simply smiled as she looked up at me. She smiled back as she passed me by. I stopped, and time stopped with me. I was frozen in a moment and had to decide how to proceed. I could simply take that moment and sear it in my memory as another moment in time to relive and contemplate or…

I turned and called to her. She turned still smiling. I asked her the time. She looked to her watch and told me. We then started talking as naturally as if we had been friends for years. We left together and headed off into the park heading towards the other side and the coffee shop that waited.

It has been years since this occurred and I find myself in that same park, in the fall and with my beloved at my side holding my arm giving me a sense of security that I have not felt since childhood. I remember something she said about that first encounter when I asked her the time. She told me much later that she was still smiling after I asked her the time for she saw the large watch on my wrist. She looks up as I chuckle, with a smile and love in her eyes that I would do anything for. Dear world, I do not feel like the leaf on the deciduous tree any more, I feel like an evergreen, alive until the very end. The path ahead is still bright with color and I feel so alive, alive like never before.

-Shiidon, July 2011

This work is a work of fiction. I sound like a broken record at times but no, I have not "found someone." The photograph is of a painting by Leonid Afremov (afremov.com). The painting is titled "When Dreams Come True." It took my breath away when I saw it and I now have three prints, including this one, hanging in my house. He paints with a pallet knife, not a brush. Think of this story as a tribute to that painting. I have been encouraged to write more stories by you, the reader (all three of you, just kidding). One of my friends today commented on my story from yesterday and suggested I rewrite it in the first person as an exercise. My response was this story. I had been wanting to write something inspired by the painting but could not get the grasp of it. I then went out yesterday on errands and became a bit clearer of the way I wanted the story to go and then the first person idea took over and within an hour of that suggestion this story formed. I hope you enjoy it. As with my poems I am surprised at what ends up coming from the keyboard as it takes on a life of its own.