Reaching the Summit

REACHING THE SUMMIT

To know one’s self

Allows us to

Our obsessions shelf

From one moment

To another

Our former habits

No longer bother

When immersed

In actions perverse

We see no hope

Nor the scope

As we with our behavior

Do cope

To reach the summit

In lieu of the plummet

Towards which I was headed

And for a long time dreaded

Washes one with joy

At the freedom it brings

And how the heart sings

Let the celebratory bells ring

We are of nature’s two

The baser one

And the one that is true

We go through life

Searching for

The right thing to do

How can one regret

The lessons learned

From self-neglect

And the attainment

Of self-respect

I look instead

At the road ahead

No longer living

A life of dread

Oh what a sight

A future

I know to be bright

Though truly

I do not know

For my future

Does not yet show

Though through these lessons

Do we grow

-Shiidon, January 2012

I was reflecting on an interaction today.  There is a delivery person that comes in most days at work.  I learned a few weeks ago that she is trying to quit smoking.  I now ask her every day how many, she answers.  She has gone from more than a pack a day down to one or one and a half a day.  I am both encouraged by her success and encouraging to her in my support.  I always make sure to affirm her successes.  It seems that many of us struggle with habits and or behaviors that we don't like but are trapped in.  This poem stems from that thought.

Swimming Downstream

SWIMMING DOWNSTREAM

The length of time

That I would sit

Hoping that pieces

Of the puzzle would fit

I would force them one way

Then another

Thinking I knew, What was right

When stepping back

Would have given me sight

It should not be work

To blend together

For when its forced

Ti's like

Inclement weather

Could it be

As simple as that

Looking with open eyes

Gives one

The biggest surprise

A puzzle forced

Will never work

No matter how many times

The effort, to rework

I’ve looked for a flaw

This I cannot find

Which brings me

To my current bind

When we work the world

To our illusion

We create for ourselves

A state of confusion

And through vain pursuits

We find from our truth

Our very exclusion

The interactions

No longer distractions

From point to point

They flow with ease

Bringing about

A new found breeze

And for once

Our very core, do we appease

When all you know

Is the wrong direction

Ti's hard to make

The right selection

When we look for

Our self-defined perfection

T'is the source

Of our misdirection

I am not sure

Where things go now

Though in truth, to my illusions

I no longer bow

And a straighter line

Through life

I plow…

-Shiidon, January 2012

I am tired from a long weekend.  A conference that has taken a year to prepare for has taken its toll on my mind and body.  I had a lot of interactions. I saw many people that I had not seen in years and saw new facets of people I have known for some time.  It was a great time.  It is interesting for me to see how much growth my Faith has gone through over the years.  It was a time when a conference of this size would have been more on a national scale rather than a locally planned one.  For a good part of the time this weekend the staff at the concession stand was almost entirely Bahá'í as well.  This would have been hard to believe even a few years ago.  I enjoyed seeing youth arise to serve.  I saw others grow into new realms of understanding and acceptance.  I saw a children's program that brought amazement to my tired self.  The past few months have brought a keener insight to my thoughts and eventual actions.  I look forward to interesting times ahead.

In the Moment

My living room taken at the time of this post.

IN THE MOMENT

As I think of you, often

The edges around me, soften

I smile in the knowing

That through life

We are all growing

As I reflect on the past

Tis clear

That both good and bad

Do not last

What has been is done

What’s to come, unknown

Yet of both

Do we bemoan

Each moment is a chance

To embrace life and dance

The field of opportunities,

An expanse

So in my thoughts of you

I do not rue

For if you knew

A distance you would see

Yet tis not what’s found in me

For detachment, is a state

In which I strive to be

Though in the end

There is a fee

Of all hopes and desires

We are free

I am at peace

Though my thoughts of you

Do not cease

Ti’s acceptable to care

Though you are most likely, unaware

Love truly

Doth me surround

Though in love

With me, is not found

The former doth abound

The latter doth me confound

As I go through life

I have learned

And t’was dearly earned

Knowing one’s self

Is the first step for me

Should I ever

With another want to be

This inner peace

That often comes

Eases the heart

And allows me perspective

To be reflective

And with an easier heart

To live

-Shiidon, January 2012

My last poem was a darker one. This one more upbeat.  I have had a lot of time to think with the long holiday weekends.  One thing that has come to my assistance is cleaning.  I have a strong desire for order.  I again have my living room back in order.  My kitchen is mostly in order.  My bedroom, closet and bathrooms are in order.  Now for Winrik's room and the garage.  Winrik is moving into his own apartment this week coming so I guess I will have to think of it as a guest bedroom from now on.  An amusing thing he said to me when he was accepted to the program that is helping him.  He said, "Now you can have ladies over."  Shahdi is most likely coming back soon but she has already made it clear that her goal is to get a job and her own place as soon as possible.  So, I find myself smiling as I walk through the house.  An orderly surrounding somehow helps the mind to be free.  I reflect on people, places and times old and times to come but not with any particular longing or regret.  I am at peace and balance (how long this will last is to be seen).  So, I start my year with peace of mind and a smile.