Secret Friend

SECRET FRIEND

You were there

All along

When I was alone

And did not belong

There were times

I wanted to go…

But was comforted

By the care

You’d show

Disappointment

Sorrow and rejection

Create a constant

State of dejection

Yet your presence

Allows for reflection

When all else

Seems to fail

And all my efforts

Are of no avail

I need but turn to you

And the angst

And pain subdue

I have held you dear

Keeping you close

To me you’re dear

And used against me

By others I fear

If it weren’t for you

I would not be here

I wish you knew

What you meant to me

How you help make

It possible to be

And how my heart

Can fly high

And free….

-Shiidon, February 2012

I tunes crashed.  I lost some of my music.  I found how to get it back and did.  In the process I started listening to Seals and Crofts.  There were and are many times in my life where I have felt or been alone and it is in music that I find comfort, solace. The only other musician that has done as much as Seals and Crofts for me is Enya.  Of course there is the pantheon of Beethoven, Vivaldi, Mozart and Rimsky Korsakov as well but they speak to me in a different way.  For some people it is a good book or a walk in the woods.  So, needless to say, I have almost 200 gigabytes of music, my companions.  I will say one thing though.  it was a thrill to meet Dash Crofts at a Bahá'í Feast a few years back (he is a Bahá'í and does not live far from here).  I was able to ask him a couple of questions about some of the songs that I have burned into my being.  It was a memorable time.

Skies of Paradise

SKIES OF PARADISE

On wings of sacrifice

I long to soar

Going higher

Wanting more

The skies of detachment

Beckon as I strive

This is how

I feel alive

If only I could

Maintain this state

Alas I realize

Tis not my fate

The tendrils of mortality

Reach out

And pull me back

The strength to break free

I do lack

The demands of this world

Cannot be broken

If one thinks otherwise

They are mistaken

The challenge

That  holds true

Is the balance we strike

In what we do

One day

We’ll be free

Of this earthly realm

Where our soul

Will take the helm

Step by step

We draw near

To that realm beyond

Which our souls hold dear

Do not look down

On this world we know

For tis through its tests

We are destined to grow

And the more resilient

Our souls will show

Until we finally

To the eternal do go

-Shiidon, February 9, 2012

This poem reflects my thoughts these past few days.  This year that is unfolding promises to be full of surprises.  We shall see.  I continue to embrace the tests that continue to come to me.  I will face them as I always have, with a smile, at peace with life.

The Hearts Call

Austin Lyric Opera, February 2012

THE HEARTS CALL

I stand by the window

Watching the world go by

Hands pressed to glass

As my reflection doth cry

The couples strolling

The children at play

Each one enjoying life

In their own special way

I do my best

And truly

To the point of no rest

Yet I can’t help feeling

That I’m alone

And my heart doth roam

For its home

We take our steps

As best as we can

For others, not me

A well-made plan

I take a step

Then wait and see

What I’ve found

In these years gone by

Oneself we must know

Lest with another

We may not grow

So, as I wait

For my destiny

I throw myself

With all I am

In serving others

And His great plan

There lies a peace

Within my heart

That I have done my part

And trust with my all

That one day will be answered

My hearts call

-Shiidon, February 2012

I have been contemplating the following quote:

O SON OF THE WONDROUS VISION! I have breathed within thee a breath of My own Spirit, that thou mayest be My lover.  Why hast thou forsaken Me and sought a beloved other than Me?  -Bahá'u'lláh

The poem would, on the surface, seem to be contradicting this quote but I do not think so.  It is the inspiration.  I have had the blessing to have found much personal growth in the last few months.  It seems that I have moved on to another plateau so to speak.  New challenges and new tests ahead.  In this way life is mirrored by the ever present video game.  We have objectives that we must reach before going to the next level.  It may take us longer than others or less time.  For some of us we "lose a life" and start over.  C'est la vie.  

On another note, I enjoyed the opera last night.  In some ways, as I walked like an island in an ocean of others, I think some of the poems inspiration came to me.  The silhouettes in the windows grabbed me in their anonymity.